A Dying Mother's Last Letter to her Son

It felt like it was only yesterday when I had witnessed such a lovely family- a mother holding her kids’ hands possessively as they walked to church happily. This scene will now be just a fond memory because a loving mother passed away, leaving her family in great distress. Nothing is as painful as the death of a love one, but when death comes with something worthy to cherish, it would become something different.

Today, September 17, 2009, when the late Marjorie "Jojie" de la Cruz Trono, will be rested to join God, her creator; let us all remember her goodness to her family and to other people. She will be gone from us forever but her memory will always live in a special spot in our hearts because she has awakened in us the feeling of being a mother and taught us a lesson to treasure. Yes, a loving mother was once again claimed by the big “C” (cancer). But in her demise, something sprouted which will live forever in the heart of her son, an unconditional and incomparable love that she has expressed on a piece of paper- the immeasurable love that only a mother could give to her child even while she was suffering from pain.

I would have treated this event just like the other normal deaths of people who were sick and just waiting for the day when God will end their agony and finally claim them to his side, but this death is different. This event spelled too much meaning for us whom she left. She may not be the person I know very well nor someone I have given too much importance but her words in her letter to her son touched my heart with such tremendous force that I needed to do something to share this very remarkable letter that is full of love, sincerity and concern from a dying mother.

In November, 2008, "Jojie" as she was fondly called wrote a letter to her younger son who was going for a recollection that day. This letter was shown to us by her sister-in-law, whom we prefer to call "Mommy Goyi," a day after Jojie's death. According to Mommy Goyi, Jojie was so alive when they visited her in the hospital where she was rushed that day and she made eveybody around her so happy because they have seen in her an unbelievable strenght. Everybody thought that something good was taking place. But unfortunately, what they thought was a good sign of recovery was in fact Jojie's way of saying goodbye to everybody, because a few hours later she passed away making everybody who visited her earlier so shocked. Cancer doesn't give a person time to properly say goodbye to love ones. It always manages to reap life when people around are unaware of it. But to the late Jojie, she didn't wait for the day to say goodbye, because she wrote the letter early for her son.

What would a mother who is already in pain and is counting her remaining days on earth say to her eight-year old son?

Dear Jacob,

First of all, I would like you to know just how lucky I am to have you as my son. I am blessed when you came into my life. You’ve been a source of inspiration in my everyday living. Every time I feel tired/lonely, you make an effort to let it all go away. Most especially during the time when I had the big “C” (cancer). I was really depressed during those times. But in those times at your age, you tried your best to comfort me. That’s the time, I came back to my senses and faced the reality that I have to fight back in order to live not for myself but for you and other members of our family. You brought me back to life “ading” (as you are fondly called by us), because when I asked if you love me and still want me to live, you said yes and you cried. It made me realize just how much important a mother is to her child. I may not always be with you physically but always bear in your mind that I always think what is best for you. Hope you grow up to be a God-fearing individual. Keep up the good work, and if I die and live again, I would still like to be your mother. I am so proud of you son.

Love and Prayer,

Inay

"Ading", means younger brother and "inay" means mother.

There’s something very noble and valuable about this letter that needs special attention. Being a mother myself, I was greatly affected by the adversity. This is not something that always happen everyday in our lives. It is a very touching moment. Somehow as I pondered further to where I had stopped thinking about what life is all about, light started to shed out and I realized that life is about loving, of giving and sharing what one has.

Life on earth is just too short. We never know what may come tomorrow but if we live to see what tomorrow will bring for us, we must make it a point to do our best, to make our family and others happy and share some moments of compassion to those who are hopeless. Only then could we say that life is worthwhile if we are able to set forth some valuable services to others.

To be a good mother is an accomplishment; an achievement with flying colors but it takes too much effort to do this. I myself am guilty of the things that I haven’t done for my child. I loathe thinking of the times when I had involved my son of things he wasn’t supposed to have experienced. Those were the mistakes that always haunted my days and nights up to this day. But then, it is not yet too late….

……For yesterday has passed and today had come… so there surely would be tomorrow and that would be the day…the day when dreams for our love ones would flourish and outshine the flaws of yesterday.

As we mothers go on with life; we must always make our children our priorities in life. We should always serve as their guiding light in their growing up years. We must be willing to sacrifice to make sure our kids live a life we dream for them because not very far from where we stand, a tunnel that is sometimes so hard to traverse is awaiting and we are never sure what can happen to us.